Call to Courage

“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen”~Brene Brown

So many of my years were spent being the person I thought I “should” be. I am the first born, which means I am an over-achiever and strive for perfectionism. Some of my younger memories include being yelled at for my first “B”, going to weight watchers at ten years old, and being made fun of for the clothes I wore and the hairstyle I chose. Before that, I was a fun loving, free spirited, vibrant, live-out-loud kind of girl. Early in my years, just like most of us, I was taught what was acceptable. I was taught how good little Catholic girls were supposed to act. I was taught that achievement was of the upmost importance. I was taught how wives and mothers were supposed to behave. I was taught what was, and was not, acceptable within a marriage and a family.

I am grateful for all of these lessons and experiences, for it has made me the person I am today. Also, due to these lessons and experience, it took me a long time to realize “who” I truly am. I thought relationships were all one sided. That I was supposed to give and love, and give and love. I had the belief that if I expressed my needs, wants, dreams, and desires, that I was selfish and self centered. I believed that if I could just be “thin enough” and “smart enough”, I would be worthy of love. I held the belief that showing “soft” emotions, such as sadness, grief, and compassion, are a sign of weakness. I was inadvertently taught that I should dim my light.

Throughout my personal journey to authenticity, I have had several experiences that have helped me re-align with my authentic self. I consider my authentic self to be that girl with the bright shining light, who is loud, and creative, and joyful, and free-spirited. I am the girl that loves all animals and takes home strays-my parents were so upset with me for one particular kitten I brought home because you could literally see how many diseases it could be carrying. I am the girl who loves all humans and can see the good in all people. I am the girl that has such deep empathy that she feels the emotions of all people around her-especially the hurt-cries with them, and consoles them. I am the girl that laughs out loud-many times so loud that it turns heads. I am the girl that is playful and joyful. I am the girl that loves spontaneity. I am the girl that will break out in dance in the middle of the store. I. AM. ME. It took a long time to re-align with this girl, and since I have found her, I refuse to let her go ever again. I am showing up. I am becoming visible. I was placed on this planet to shine. I am unique in what I offer to the world…just as we all are.

My big dream is that we all connect with our higher purpose. We all re-connect with our authentic selves. We all let our unique light shine. Hopefully, you are now invigorated and excited for your personal journey!

So, let me leave you with a few steps that will help you get started:

1. Get quiet. Take a few minutes out of the day to sit still and in a quiet area. Turn your attention inward. It helps to take a few deep, cleansing breaths to anchor yourself and your attention. You can try square breathing, which includes: inhale for the count of 4, hold for the count of 4 and exhale for the count of 4.
2. Get curious. What is your inner chatter telling you? So much of our chatter can be negative and fear based. We are just recognizing our thoughts at this moment. Be sure not to cling or hold onto any specific thoughts…just allow them to come and go, like clouds passing in the sky.
3. Increase awareness of judgments. Notice any “should’s” that are directed towards yourself, others, or the situation. Don’t try to push them away or pretend they are not there. Accept your thoughts just as they are. And don’t judge your judgements!
4. Practice compassion. Recognize what you need at that moment. Many times it is statements of affirmations from your wise, loving adult. Your inner child is hurting and needs your comfort. Identify the statements you need to hear at that moment that support and comfort you. These are the statements that help connect you with your authentic self.
5. Embrace yourself. Fully accept who you are. Fully accept who you are meant to be and what you were put on this planet to do. Connect with your inner child. This is your essence. We were placed on this earth to experience joy, connection, and belonging. When we embrace our authentic self, we are able to experience all of these emotions.

My call to courage for you…align with your authentic self and let your light shine brightly. Shine on every person you come in contact with. Don’t ever dim your light again. Become visible. Show up for yourself and you will show up for others.

Much love, LJ

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